2nd child dilemma and anxiety...

With Peaches, it was really easy coming up with a name but Berries has given us such a hard time but by last night, that is 5 days shy of her being delivered is when we came up with one. We've decided to keep it a secret until she's born plus it has absolutely nothing to do with berries. It's a French name that rhymes with framboise - raspberry in English - but neither of those tickled my fancy as a nickname hence, Berries. One can never imagine how difficult naming a baby is! I've been late with everything on this pregnancy, (as is the case in my daily life)... I'm never in a rush until when I'm running late. But as I type this, Berries' stuff are packed and the MIL, upon my request came over yesterday to help me arrange the drawers. I'll see whether I have any energy in my reserve to sort out and pack my stuff tonight.

I told the BF I was not going to spend more than 100€ buying new "gagdets" for the baby only to dispose them off after 6 months and therefore settled for second hand. I checked out all that I needed online, got the numbers of the sellers but then proceeded to the second hand store before making the calls. I got the car seat for 5€, moved to the next shop where I managed to bargain the baby carrier that will act as her bed to 15€ given that some parts were broken and I figured we can improvise how to fix that. The changing table came down from 54€ to 30€ with a promise to take it back and get 15€ for it at the end of its use; I also took for 1€ some support that'll use when she'll be able to go in the bathtub with her big sister and a mattress for 9€ to place on the changing table. On the overall, I was quiet pleased with my day. At the counter as I was really bargaining, this pink lady tells the shop-owner that at least she is not like me, in the sense of squeezing the euros! I hushened her up by telling her that her budget was not the same as mine so she should just quit with the comparisons.

I've had people I know stop over to check on me before the D-day and I ashamadely had a small drink once. Then I found myself texting the bf asking him to get me non-alcoholic beer. It started with one bottle and when the second one made me feel a little bit tipsy, I had to stop and totally restrain myself from continuing. The following day got me depressed and I figured the only way out will be a beer. By the third day, I just had to stop as my conscious couldn't let me curve after restraining myself for the past million weeks or so!! I must admit that I really tried keeping it clean with the foods and the drinks.

I guess Peaches is resigned to the fact that it's not a baby boy but she ain't admitting either that it's a baby girl, she just says "Ohhhh, I can't wait for the baby to be born" and she tells the baby secrets every night! She is hyper clingy to Mama, I totally understand and I just hope the transition passes on without any hitches. I surprised myself because I stopped yelling and became really good maybe Berries helped me with that :-)

Well, I check in at the hospital on Tuesday and have the CS done on Wednesday morning. The BF is still deliberating and mustering the courage as to whether he'll have the grace to go through the whole procedure as I officially sent him an invitation to be there. I swear I can't wait for all this to be over! It feels like 9 years of pregnancy. 9 months have never felt this long!