Nostalgia is a good feeling, makes one reflect on what's going on around them. In my case, it doesn't make me wish for what I had in the past as I always choose to live in the present. It only makes me realize how much people do change, or even reveals other hidden characteristics that aren't really positive or motivating. It could be my personality or just who I am but I've always thought and noticed everyone or most people around me change as I try to remain the same until their influence runs on me and I fit into whom they've become. So I change too so just to fit in their context.
When I was single, i tried to keep in touch, mostly with family, my close-knit and even virtual friends. When I migrated, I continued to keep in touch. When I met the bf and got into a relationship, I continued to keep in touch. When I got my first child, I still continued to keep in touch. I wasn't struggling, I just felt it was important, limit imperative to! I called, I sent postcards, we created home-made cards with the daughter and sent them, I sent money, I was all over the place because that's how I felt things were supposed to be done. So recently, a few months ago, during one of my reflection moments, I decided to stop. I won't get into details under what circumstances, but I just decided to stop!
And then you realize that wow, no one really bothers! No calls, no texts, no goodwill messages. Not that I was expecting that in return, but I just realized that things were not balanced. So I decided to stop! Stop giving handouts, stop sending those post and home-made cards, stopped calling, stopped sending messages apart from on a need to basis. In short, i just stopped giving a damn.
I still send post-cards and make cards with my daughter to send to those pals and family members who remember to replicate. Fortunately such kind of people do exist! The kind of people who choose to have a life besides social media. That person who will still call to wish you a happy birthday without a reminder from FB. That person who even shocks you by remembering your daughter's birthday and either sends a card or call. That person who'll just stop by to say hello just for the heck of it.
I guess when we have our own families, the rest can easily be classed as "by-the-way" in this case not by choice but by consciousness to.
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